


Holding on and letting go

by enjoyseries



Category: The Last Ship (TV)
Genre: 2x13, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-09
Updated: 2015-09-10
Packaged: 2018-04-19 22:40:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4763663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enjoyseries/pseuds/enjoyseries
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My own vision of what could happen in season 3.<br/>Do not read if you haven't watch 2x13 yet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

She's known the minute that man appeared from the darkness that her life was in danger. She's known she was trapped, she was on her own without anyone to protect her and she would have never run away from the enemy anyway.

Yet she was afraid, her muscles were tense and she had tried to stay at a reasonable distance. Perhaps she could have reason him, if only he had let her the chance. But what she saw in his eyes was pure madness and hatred; hatred against _her_.

Perhaps she should have run away after all. _Yeah, perhaps_. She thought lying on the floor, trying to keep pressure on her wound.

She was a doctor; she knew very well what would follow if no one came to her aid. Soon her body would be numb, her mouth would be filled with blood, she would sink into sleep,… Soon she would bleed to death. If only someone had heard the gunshot, _if only_ …

Seconds seemed like hours, and she could feel the pressure she had tried to maintain on her wound slowly being reduced until her hand finally drifted off on the floor.

'Rachel!' She heard a man voice screaming her name and saw her Captain rushing to her side.

'To-om.' She managed to say.

'Shh, it's okay. I'm right here.' He softly said, trying to keep his cool. He immediately took off his jacket, and placed firmly against her wound; the pressure made her moan in pain. She saw his horrified look; she thought it must be really bad. He couldn't stop looking at all this blood, everywhere on her dress and his jacket. She hardly raised her bloody and shaky hand and gently encircled his wrist with her fingers. She wanted him to look at her, and he did. He plunged his gaze into hers; they both saw the fear in each other's eyes.

'What the hell happened?' He whispered almost desperately to her. A few minutes ago, she was standing and smiling in front of him, both flirting and most important she was safe.

'There was a gu-guy.' She inhaled and exhaled slowly, trying to focus on him. 'He wanted the cure, from me. Then he shot me.' She said these last words in a whisper, her eyes slowly closing.

'Stay with me, Rachel. Don't sleep, open your eyes.' He said loudly.

'I'm tired.' She mumbled but fought to keep her eyes open.

'Don't you dare falling asleep on me!'

'Aye, Captain.' She chuckled a bit, making him smirk too.

'You're gonna be okay, Rachel. You're gonna get through this.' He whispered almost inaudibly. She didn't know if he said that to reassure her, or himself. She felt the metallic taste in her mouth; she could taste her own blood. _It's just a matter of minutes._ She thought.

'I'm sorry, for everything.' She said, closing her eyes. He couldn't fight his tears anymore, and let them fall.

'Please, stay awake.' He almost begged her. He felt so powerless right now, kneeling to her side, keeping pressure on her wound as blood didn't stop flowing though. She opened her eyes once last time, looking at him and slightly smiled. _Goodbye, Tom._ She thought.

Her vision was blurry then dark. She heard him scream her name and she thought hearing Tex's voice and maybe Rio's too but it was far, far away.

Maybe she had dreamed it. Yeah, maybe she had.

TBC (or not)


	2. Chapter 2

He had been staring at his hands for hours now. He'd washed them again and again, even when all the blood was gone. He had lost Darien, he couldn’t even think about losing Rachel too.

He shouldn't have let her go, he should have done something, should have told her what she meant to him, he should have made sure she had returned to her room safely.

He couldn't stop turning this mess in his head. He couldn't stop playing it again and again, like a horror movie without an end.

 

_'We heard a gunshot, what-?' Tex ran towards Tom and stopped abruptly when he saw Rachel lying on the floor, with Tom's hands covered with blood on her chest. Rios who was just behind Tex came to his side and kneeled next to Rachel and checked her pulse._

_'I got a pulse, but we need to do it quickly.' He gently lifted her on the side. 'The bullet didn't get through. She needs surgery.' He took off his own jacket, torn it off, passed it around her and tried to tight it but Tom didn't move his hands. He glanced at him but he still didn't react._

_'Captain?' He insisted._

_Tom was pressing hard on her wound, his look locked on her face. The doc could see in his eyes he was chocked and had lost his cool. Tex approached him, and placed a hand on his shoulder._

_'Tom, you have to let go.' He finally came back to his sense and got up with a hard look on his face._

_'Block all exits. I want nobody getting in or out. Find me who did this, NOW!' He ordered._

_Green had arrived just in time to hear Captain's orders. Lt. and Tex nodded then ran towards the reception room._

_Even if it'd happened a few hours earlier, some memories were blurred between panic and adrenaline. They took her to the nearest hospital, both aware that it was her only chance to survive. He still didn't know who to thank -luck or any god- for the fact that this hospital was the most sophisticated one in the area, which had remained in good state to take care of this kind of trauma._

_Having to let go of her hand and watch her leaving from behind two hinged doors was much harder than he had imagined._

 

'Captain Chandler.' Rios called him for a second time, putting him out of his thoughts. Tom quickly stood up on his feet, trying to not appear too panicked.

'How is she?' He almost didn't dare asking.

'She's stable. The bullet didn't hit vital organs, just some muscle and two ribs. But I must be honest, we almost lost her; she went into cardiac arrest during the operation.'

'Can I see her?'

He nodded. 'But she's still unconscious and she probably won't wake up until hours. Actually, it's up to her now.'

'Thanks, doc.' Tom said. Rios saw all the emotions in his look, his blue eyes piercing his soul. He knew he really meant it.

He led him to the hallway in which was Doctor Scott's room and then let him some time alone. He stayed a few minutes standing in the corridor, unable to move or walk to the room. He was afraid of what he would see inside, he wasn't sure he could take it anymore.

After two deep breaths, he moved forward and opened the door slowly. There she was; laying on that bed, looking so fragile and pale, her left arm in a sling. He approached carefully, took a chair and came to sit on her right side, quietly. He ran his hand across his weary face, relived to see her alive. He stared a few moments at her chest, slowly rising and falling. He saw a clip sensor on her right index, linking her to a monitor with regular beeps incessantly ringing in his head.

He wanted to touch her, make her feel he was right here with her; he needed the touch but he was afraid to hurt her. He gently and carefully imprisoned her hand between his, and lowered his head to rest his forehead on the top of their linking limbs. He felt tears coming up, a sob going through his body like a tsunami destroying everything in its path. He tried to contain it somehow, but let some tears streaming down his cheeks. He couldn't let go; he had to be strong, now more than ever, for her, for them. He looked up and swallowed the sob, inhaled deeply then looked back at her. He suddenly felt an immense wave of guilt, for everything he had done or hadn't done, said or hadn't said. _Everything_.

'Come one, Rachel.' He whispered. 'You have to wake up, there's still so much things to live.'

 

TBC...


End file.
